3-2-1 Mindset Mondays

3-2-1 Mindset Mondays

AP2

Hello lovely readers and welcome back to Mindset Mondays! The only weekly post that enjoys eating its own words.

Following a 3-2-1 approach, it contains 3 thoughts from me (that you should ignore), 2 quotes from others (that you should read), and 1 thing I’ve been reading, watching or listening to this week that has helped me grow.

As a bonus I’ve finished with 1 joke that’s so bad, it’s good.

Let’s begin!

3 x Thoughts:

1) Emotions are like tunnels. You have to go through them in order to get to the light on the other side. Resist and you’ll end up stuck in the dark.

2) As a rule: The dumber the question feels, the more it needs to be asked. The only real fool is the one who deliberately remains in the dark. 

3) A wining formula for life: Radical Acceptance followed by Meaningful Action.

2 x Quotes:

“In this world there are only two tragedies. One is not getting what one wants, and the other is getting it.”

— Oscar Wilde

“When the starting point is self-love and self-appreciation, we already give ourselves what we need so we don’t need to try to take it from people.”

–Betul Erbasi (SOURCE: https://pointlessoverthinking.com/2021/05/30/self-appreciation/)

1 x Thing:

This BBC article: Why some narcissists actually hate themselves. The article argues that narcissists – far from loving who they are – actually suffer from issues related to self-hatred. It suggests that this understanding can help us see through their actions and foster compassion for them instead. Well worth the quick read!

1 x Joke:

Another far side comic for you all this week, I hope you enjoy!

Thanks ladies and gentlemen, I’m here all week! As always I welcome ALL thoughts and opinions on this blog. Please let us know in the comments section below.

One bonus question: How can you make your actions more meaningful today?

PREVIOUS MONDAY POST:

Mindset Mondays – 31/05/21

39 thoughts on “3-2-1 Mindset Mondays”

    • Poor Wayne 😂 haha. Thanks Art – I was busy today so it was a little shorter than usual. Still, I’m pleased you enjoyed it. Wishing you well 🙏

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  • This thought stood out for me. “The dumber the question feels, the more it needs to be asked. The only real fool is the one who deliberately remains in the dark. ” it’s simple yet profound.

    We can make actions more meaningful today by being more present in our day.

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    • Thank you Kevin! I’m glad it resonated. I like your thinking regarding how to make our actions more meaningful. I agree. If we are truly present, if we look deeply, we can find meaning even in the seemingly mundane tasks that we do. 🙏

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  • The other day I was listening to funny air traffic control clips on Youtube. ATC thought a 747 was coming in for an emergency landing because of an engine failure. The German pilot was cool as a cucumber and said nope, no emergency. But they had engine failure? Yup, but no emergency. When ATC said emergency vehicles would be standing by on landing, the pilot said nope, no need, we’re good. I love it – assess the situation and act accordingly, with no need to make it any bigger than it needs to be.

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    • If you’ve got 4 engines and you only lose 1 it isn’t necessarily an emergency. A 747 can fly perfectly well with 3 engines. Even two engine aircraft can fly at maximum takeoff weight with 1 engine. He was right to keep his cool. This actually happened to a colleague of mine. He lost an engine when flying from Hong kong to Rome. Instead of diverting he continued all the way to destination. It wasn’t an emergency so he wasn’t worried. Thanks for sharing Ashley

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  • I love the quote about self appreciation giving us what we need so we are not taking it from others! 💕Struggling a little with the narcissist article. I guess it matters where that person stands relative to authority. I worked for one, and there was zero opportunity to stop the damage done to so many. Perhaps if it’s a peer, it’s a little easier to ignore some of it and find compassion. But the narcissist, or more likely psychopath, that I worked for left trauma in her wake. And I’m still recovering. My proximity might color perspective here though. It could be a helpful distinction when it’s a friend or peer. Compassion is always a great goal. Anyway, thanks for a thought provoking 3-2-1!

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    • I’m not sure where I stand on that article either. I like to share articles that get me thinking differently. My take was that this knowledge isn’t meant to excuse their behaviour, but to use that knowledge to look through it so it doesn’t affect you personally. You use it feel pity them instead of resentment. That is is something at least. Thank you Kathy. I appreciate you sharing your thoughts. I’m glad you enjoyed the post. 🙏

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      • I love to be challenged to think differently. Obviously our experience colors our thoughts but it has been helpful to feel pity instead of anger. It’s just taken a minute to get there ha. I appreciate breaking it into two groups as well. Enjoy this thoughtful Monday!😊

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      • I was bullied a great deal in high school so understand your sentiments completely. It took me a long time to forgive those people. Ultimately I came to the conclusion that forgiveness was for me. Not for them. Its what allowed me to move on. My deep interest in psychology stemmed from that period in my life. In my attempts to understand my own depression as well as the motivations of those who hurt me. Of course we are all dealing with different demons that taint our thoughts and perceptions. From greater awareness/understanding I do believe we can find peace. 🙏

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  • I think the thoughts are wonderful. Acceptance is only worthwhile if it leads to something meaningful. What good is being open to thoughts and actions other than your own if you’re going to be glum about it. Might as well show your indifference openly. And self-love and self-appreciation are so perfect in nature that attaining them at times is a grand illusion. I do agree that seeking validation from others is one of the biggest mistakes we can make. It’s always a pleasure to read your thoughts and shared wisdoms. 🙂

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  • I love your first two thoughts in particular:

    – I agree we should give space and time to process and work through our emotions. The alternative leaves us in a darker place of feeling stuck.

    – When I was younger, I always prefaced questions with, “this might be a dumb question but…” Now I encourage myself and others not to say that. No such thing as a dumb question.

    This was a nice afternoon pick me up. Thanks AP! 👍👍🤞🏻

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    • No such thing as a dumb question is right. The dumber thing is not to ask it. I say we should all get comfortable asking lots of questions. Remain curious. Never be afraid to play the fool. In truth we all are anyway. Cheers Ab. Have a wonderful week ahead 🙏

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  • As far your thoughts on ’emotions’ it’s always a confusing subject.
    Some say resist emotions and some say allow it.
    Your 2 nd and 3 thoughts are Gems unfortunately…so I can’t ignore.
    Love both the quotes
    Enjoyed the BBC article and the joke.
    👍👍👍

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    • I don’t believe resisting emotions works. In my experience it only gives them strength. Allowing emotions to arise and then pass is what allows you to let go of them. I say that after a lifetime of resisting them myself. That’s also what I believe acceptance is about. Acknowledging and showing compassion towards your emotions, however difficult.
      Thank you for sharing your thoughts. I’m so pleased you enjoyed the post 🙏

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      • Thank you my friend.
        It’s said by resisting the emotions one can become stronger and canface the situations.

        The other aspect is just allow the emotions to stay for sometime only to let them go later as you rightly said.
        In this part one has to suffer emotion for a short time before letting it go.

        May be one becomes softer.

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      • I see your point. I think perhaps that strategy can be useful in the short term. Not to let our emotions take control during certain situations. Still, my feeling is by acknowledging your feelings you don’t have to let them take control of your actions. There is a difference between accepting your emotions and letting them control your actions. If I’m scared for example, I note it. I note that I am anxious or angry. I accept those feelings are there and then I go ahead and do what I know/believe is right. I’m not resisting my emotions but I’m not letting them dictate the terms either. By doing that I believe one can gain a huge a lot of strength/confidence. I also believe this is how you work with your emotions instead of against them. You negotiate with them. You say to yourself, “I understand you’re scared but think about how you’ll feel after you have said that or done that.” The moment someone wishes they weren’t anxious they become more anxious. This is why I believe resistance doesn’t work – at least not in the long term. People who keep resisting fear end up with an anxiety disorder (I speak from experience). I believe we must embrace our demons in order to be truly free from their control. That’s my 2 cents worth. Thank you for engaging me in a thoughtful discussion. I wish you well 🙏

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      • Well said.
        True.
        Your personal experience definitely helps others.
        Emotions are nothing but pent up pressure and no need to burst, instead release the pressure in a gradual way without any hard feeling and just flow with waves.
        Good for health too.
        Thank you for this beneficial discussion

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  • Pingback: 3-2-1 Mindset Mondays – Clear Air Turbulence

  • Hi I’m new to your blog, and totally mind blown by your words and the way you organized this post. Love the idea of 3-2-1

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    • Thank you so much. The joke is just something silly. I’m not sure there is anything to get. Just a dig at people’s need for a scapegoat (and people called Wayne. I hope you’ll come back and visit again soon 🙏

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