How To Gain Enlightenment While Taking A Dump

Today I felt like some good old fashioned toilet humour was in order and so I came up with this stupendous blog post idea: How To Gain Enlightenment While Taking A Dump.

Or, to give it another title: What Makes A Good Toilet Book For Moments Of Profound Pooing. #toiletbooks #profoundpooing (I’m hoping to start a trend.)

Before I get onto it (ha), there is a serious point I’d like to make first. One about designing your environment to help cultivate better habits. In this case, putting a book to read next to your toilet instead of mindlessly scrolling on your phone (because I know you do) when you go for a number two.

James Clear talks about the power of designing your environment to help promote and stick to better habits (or break bad ones) at length in his brilliant book Atomic Habits.

He notes,

Environment design is powerful not only because it influences how we engage with the world but also because we rarely do it. Most people live in a world others have created for them. But you can alter the spaces where you live and work to increase your exposure to positive cues and reduce your exposure to negative ones.”

Some Examples Of Environment Design Include:

Placing a glass of water by your bed to drink first thing in the morning.

Leaving your phone in a different room when you go to sleep so its neither the last thing you look at before sleeping, nor the first thing you look upon waking (FYI there’s this great invention I heard of called an alarm clock).

Placing a fruit bowl on your living room table to encourage better eating habits. Similarly placing bottles of water around your house to keep you hydrated.

– And, if you want to promote better reading habits while also reducing harmful mindless smartphone scrolling, placing a book by the side of your toilet for when you sit down to do a poo.

So What Makes A Good Toilet Book?

When picking a good toilet book to read I think the topic of the book is less important than the type.

Novels tend not to work well because they are designed to be read over a matter of hours. Unless you had Indian for dinner the night before, I don’t think any heavy duty book which requires a great deal of reading at any one time is best.

Instead I suggest books designed to be read in short occasional bursts.

Generally you want lightweight books, although, if you have the space in your bathroom, larger coffee table style books could work too.

It can be fictional or humorous, depending on what your preference is, but for me, I find that spiritual books help to keep my grounded, while I’m giving back to the earth…

What Are The Benefits?

The great thing about toilet books, especially spiritual ones with many thought provoking quotes, is you can really sit on them. Read a quote, put the book down and then ponder the meaning of life.

You’ll also be surprised by how much reading you can get done as the weeks and months pass by. I only started this habit recently but have already finished several books.

An added bonus is that it serves as a great reminder to leave your phone outside the bathroom so you’re not making the very unhygienic and unhealthy habit of scrolling and wiping. (Hygiene being very important these days of course. #coronavirus)

While it might see like obvious etiquette to put the book (or your phone down) before wiping – should one accidentally mistake the order of things, something which, incidentally, is much more likely to happen when scrolling on your phone, at the very least the toilet book stays in the toilet. Should you make such a mistake – unlike your phone – it’s not coming out of the bathroom with you.

Do You Have Any Recommendations?

There are loads to choose from so I’ll just suggest one that resonated deeply. A beautifully illustrated book called, “The Boy, the Mole, the Fox and the Horse” by Charlie Mackesy.

It’s not only deeply moving and thought provoking, it’s a beautiful piece of art in its own right. I could pick any quote from the book and it would be worth sharing, but I’ll leave you with just one that hit home for me on a personal level (and just in case you happen to be on the toilet right now).

“What is the bravest thing you’ve ever said?” asked the boy…

“Help”, said the horse.


(Thanks for reading everyone! I’m curious if anyone else indulges in this peculiar habit of mine? If so do you have any good toilet book suggestions? Or any other good ideas for environement design around the house? I’d love to hear from you below.)